I’ve put on some low fi music. It’s playing from my phone and I am also typing on my phone. I’m at home in the beautiful city of Zwollywood. My little European city. I have a view of my bike in the garden. Trees, yellow flowers and pink ones. It’s cloudy but I can see a bit of blue sky.

I woke up really early this morning and went for a walk. It started raining and the rain intensified. I went home and closed my app that I just downloaded that is supposed to motivate me to go for walks. This app is recommended by a good cause that has the mission for healthy brains. Hopefully I’ll go on many more waks. I truly also enjoy biking and am happy I own a bike and live in the Netherlands that is full of bike lanes.

I am also happy that I get to leave the Netherlands and get to see mountains. Who knows I might be climbing some. For now I am really happy to lie down on my soft sofa. I am in my soft robe and have a warm soft blanket over me. So nice.

I am not tired, I feel nearly exhausted. I have had busy days, a busy year. If I read my past blogs, I just get tired of myself and from reading it. I guess this year has been stressful and I felt a nearly constant ask that was just a little too much. I’ve felt overwhelmed at times. The sofa is really comforting now. I am also enjoying the low fi music. It’s relaxt and happy. It’s chill and still has a beat to it. Comfy. No lyrics, purely instrumental.

I am hanging out and my friend told me to treat myself. Well, do I have news for you?! I graduated!!! I f*cking finished this study. I’ve done it! I am happy and a little touched by it too. I had so many hills to climb in life, let downs, hardships and this is a win. A success. A job finished. All the hard work now has a ending to it which is: you’ve got your diploma. You did it, you’ve completed the years of stress, fear, doing new things, throwing yourself into challenge after challenge, finding new internships year after year, meeting so many new people, going to London, being alone quite a bit, living in a tinie tiny prison, making the best of it, by swimming, salsa, hanging out with friends, going to the market, discovering new food, making cards, making a photo book, making a short documentary… There are so many adventures I had along the way. I’ve tried to teach many students English along the way and a little bit of pedagogy along the way. I’ve had many bosses and I have stood up at hours I wish to never do again. I nearly crashed my car while falling asleep on the high way. I have travelled, made friends and found my boyfriend. My friend, my homework buddy and later my partner. Só special and I am só grateful. He treats me so kindly. I am happy that he is in my life.

And I am really happy to be able to share this wonderful news of graduating with all the lovely people in my life. My friends and family. I am so happy that they are so happy for me and proud of me. They know that it has been a battle, I’ve struggled, been insecure, have worked hard, wanted to give up but didn’t. They know it’s been a journey.

And I am glad that my boyfriend was there by my side for the last few months and listened to the frustrations and the fear and sadness and never left my side. I am thankful that he listens when I tell him about my aunt who died and that I got really angry at some young boys shouting ‘cancer’ which is a swear word in the Netherlands and he stood by my side. Even in all my overwhelm, I find a way to calm down by phoning a friend and then I can just have a lovely pizza dinner by the water with my loving partner.

This partner is the first partner I have some confidence of love and it having a chance of working out! We get to have the lows and highs together. We celebrated my good news on Monday by going out to play some pool.

I’m going to try and make this day as chill as can be. I hope you are doing well wherever you are and until next time! X